Be a man.
These three words exist to remind men that they are slacking on the expectations required of them from society. The question is, who made these standards?
These are just a few of the clichés expected of all Nigerian men.
1. Be obsessed with football.
It is not enough to like golf, or be satisfied with playing and watching basketball. Football is the Nigerian first choice sport. Every open field is a waste if it is used for anything other than football. What in God’s round earth is Baseball?
2. Love video games.
Every Nigerian male is expected to have at some point in time loved video games, whether he’s playing FIFA and PES at a little game shop or coursing through Far Cry.
3. Work out or walk out.
It is quite common among young circles to regard guys without muscles as wimps. Everyone is headed for that chisel life.
You can’t be skinny in peace.
4. Africa Magic is sacrilege.
Yes, some guys love their Africa Magic Yoruba and never miss an episode of their favourite telenovelas. Still doesn’t make them lesser.
5. You must like Hip Hop.
It is almost criminal to be a young Nigerian man and like R&B more than rap or any fast tempo music. Country music is a no no. Rock may fly but the harder the better.
6. Drool over women.
Some men don’t like women for reasons best known to them. Period.
7. Electrician/mechanic/handyman.
Wherever there is a working bulb, there must be a guy who got his hands dirty or was made to since he its ‘guy stuff.’
8. Alcohol.
No sir. Because he doesn’t drink alcohol doesn’t make him less of a man.
9. Obsessing over cars.
It is a Chevrolet Camaro 2013? Okay. Not every guy cares really.
10. Be completely useless in the kitchen.
Probably explains why being able to pound yam has become a criteria for Nigerian men seeking wives.