While we were sleeping, Niger Delta militancy went all Hollywood on us

Remember when we had militant groups like Niger Delta People’s Volunteer Force (NDPVF) led by Mujahid Asari-Dokubo and the Niger Delta Vigilante (NDV) led by Ateke Tom? Or even MEND?



Well, those days took a back seat when the amnesty program came into full swing.

But now, things have gotten more aggressive again.

Kanye seriously

These guys are now comical, literally.

kanye shake head gif


We had the Niger Delta Avengers, clearly a complete rip-off of Marvel Comics’ Avengers. We wonder if anyone of them has a suit that can fly around and drop missiles, or soldiers who are almost invincible like Captain America.

Captain America gang


These guys have managed to pull off daring attacks, from bombing pipelines to managing to hit important gas supply lines, thereby affecting Nigeria’s power generation adversely.



As if that’s not enough, another group has come, and they call themselves the New Delta Suicide Squad.

Nope, they will not tie bombs to their chests and blow themselves to smithereens.

Caleon surprise

They are simply a rip-off of DC Comics’ Suicide Squad.

Suicide Squad

Apparently, all the original names went with the Tompolo era. Just in case these militants decide to rebrand, we have a few suggestions.
Taking notes

They could try Movement for the actualization of Hydra. Or Niger Delta Justice League. Or Movement for the Niger Delta Koto Aiye.  The New Delta X-Men sounds good too.



Hopefully, our military steps up and actually hunts down these guys to put an end the madness, instead of ransacking settlements and intimidating innocent civilians.

Obama out




When God was sharing chill, I was at the back of the line trying to start a fire.

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