Maybe you haven’t heard, but Nigerian Instagram comedians seem to believe that if you haven’t worn an ill-fitting wig, slathered on some badly applied makeup (if you’re going to apply makeup, bitch you better make sure you’re on fuhleek,) and perpetuated some stereotypes about women, you’re not ready to do comedy?
Don’t believe me? Let’s go a hunting.
1. Aphrican Ape
A video posted by ereme. (@twyse_116) on
4. The Fox Himself
Top marks for the ‘field slave’ accent at the end.
Notice how the comedians who do this are all men?
We shall not talk about how the majority of these skits are desperately unfunny, or how little effort these people actually put into their craft, or even the underlying perpetuation of stereotypes that these ‘comedy’ skits promote. Because seriously…
What does concern me is when people who should know better get in on the action.
You might not know Chinedu Emmanuel (I didn’t either,) from his radio shows on Wazobia FM, but you’ll know him for his new side gig as an Instagram comedian. His comedic alterego ‘Nkechi’ is supposed to be a caricature of a judgemental, illiterate, Brazilian wig wearing, retired runs girl,- because you know, Nollywood has told us this is how they talk- who speaks on several topics.
Granted, a number of the situations he chooses to address are quite interesting, and he has the accent and mannerisms he is trying to portray down to a science.
But we’re tempted to ask, is what he’s doing really comedy?
Cos it seems to us like an excuse to share his more controversial views on other people’s private lives without being seen as judgemental, or labelled a gossip. You know, considering his posts are usually targeted at ‘Instagrant girls’, whatever that means.
Would have sworn that every girl who uses Instagram to share her pictures is an ‘Instagrant’ girl, but I don’t have an Nkechi alter-ego, so what do I really know?
But that one is not even my business.
The one that lit a fire under my ass is the fact that Oga Nedu is here casually endorsing a number of ridiculous opinions that eventually lead to the exploitation of women through vile acts like rape and sexual assault.
Take this glowing example.
“What is good for the geese, is good for the gander” –>>> Peter X Paul. Super eagles X Super falcons. Fanta X Coke. Bread X Beans. CANOPY Brothers X PARACHUTE sisters. Tag all the ‘Instagrant’ girls that must finish what they start by force. Directed by: @ezugwuchukwudi X Nkechi’s hair: @lifeehair X Production assistant: @oliveemodi
A video posted by NEDU (@nedu_wazobiafm) on
Since when did buying something for a woman guarantee you her vagina? Did she force your hand or hold a gun to your head?
It’s funny how we sorely miss what we have the most; the moment we lose it. Someone is waiting for a golden opportunity to worship the very ground on which the individual you are taking for granted at the moment walks upon. That chance will surely come!!! Tag all the girls who keep posting men just like 2016 budget. Directed by: @ezugwuchukwudi X Nkechi’s hair: @lifeehair
When did a woman telling a man ‘No’ ever stop him from continuing to ‘toast’ her?
Do you know how many women have been killed because they said ‘No’?
Would it kill you to use your Google?
#NkechiSpeaks #Nkechihereagain —>>>> Sometimes, letting go doesn’t make you a failure. Most often, it’s half the problem solved. It’s not a crime to expect much from anyone. But, it’s foolhardy to hope they’ll change just for our sake. The taste of rotten tomatoes will remain same whether in egusi soup or vegetable stew. Tag your friends who are ‘holding on’ like Arsene Wenger Directed by @ezugwucc X Nkechi’s hair: @lifeehair
A video posted by NEDU (@nedu_wazobiafm) on
You know, because domestic violence, abuse and gaslighting is just a simple matter of waking up and leaving. You know, because we haven’t heard so many stories of women being forced back into abusive marriages. You know, comedy>>>>people’s lives.
#NkechiSpeaks #NkechiHereAgain —>>>>> It’s funny how what we so desire prior to its acquisition becomes worthless the next instant. Learn to appreciate what you have in your possession. You’ll either live with the fond memories if fate is kind enough to allow you keep such or regret not giving it your best when it’s gone. Directed by @ezugwuchukwudi // Nkechi’s hair: @lifeehair Cc: @wazobiatvng @baudex @krakstv @onlyinnigeria @funny_african_pics @emmaohmagod
Women get shamed for everything, even for watching television. You know, if you watch television and your husband cheats on you with an ‘Instagrant’ girl, it is all your fault.
I could go on and on, but it’s all too demoralizing.
The moral of the epistle according to Nedu of Wazobia FM is, you will be shamed for every and anything you do. If you’re an ‘Instagrant’ girl, you will get shamed, if you’re a wife who stays home and watches television instead of Quilox chilling, you will get shamed. By a man in a bad wig no less.
I would like to finish this by affirming this often ignored truth:
It is possible to be a comedian without making women the brunt of your jokes. That might require you actually using your brains and doing some writing (an Instagram comedian’s kryptonite), but it is possible.
Believe me, it is.
Semira Bello is lacking in conscience and lives her life on Youtube. When she isn’t watching Iroko TV, she is writing ‘serious’ articles about fashion and pretending to apply make up.