1. Your relationship is powered by the Internet.
Babe, can you hear me? It’s breaking.
2. And data costs money.
I don’t care.
3. You tell the people around you that selfies are rubbish.
4. But you sneak away every hour to send hourly selfie updates.
Sent 37th selfie of the day. Over.
5. You every time you see couples doing couple things.
You people should leave my front please.
6. You want to stop talking to them for a while, to help with the torture.
This is too much for me to handle.
7. But then you can’t do without them again.
Kuku kill me.
8. Some days you just can’t deal with the frustration and you start vexing anyhow.
9. When you get lectured about how long distance relationships don’t last.
Is it your relationship?
10. And then someone comes to ask, “What if they are cheating on you?”
11. You need to work out creative methods to be romantic, every time.
Babe, I’mma be a clown for you.
12. When you completely run out of things to say, every time.
13. When your bae tells you they are a little busy at an event so you just say “Okay have fun”.
I have been dumped.
14. Everybody thinks you are just a phone addict but they dunno your story. They dunno.
Bae is on the other side.
15. When you promise to always be there, but you know you can’t be there. At all.
17. When bae is finally coming.
18. The nervousness that hits you just a few hours to seeing bae.
What if none of this is real?
19. When you finally see bae.