1. When your period first comes and the first thing your parents tell you is, “You let boy touch you, you die.”
Muzzbe Ebola.
2. You miss your period and you start wondering whether someone you hugged gave you pregnancy.
All these boys and their rubbish touch and follow.
3. Then another person comes to tell you that spirit husband has given you spirit pregnancy.
Is there spirit money please?
4. When men talking to you forget that your eyes are not on your breast.
Hellooooo? My eyes are up here.
5. Yes, men still whistle at women on the street in 2016.
Kuku tell us if you’ve started vigilante work.
6. Because they won’t let you have big breast or big yansh in peace.
Free me.
7. Everyone looks straight at you when someone is talking about the importance of marriage.
Shey I should marry myself?
8. When a guy is suddenly vexing because you don’t want to dance with him at a party.
Is it your dance Mr Man?
9. When another guy is trying to touch you unneccessarily.
Do I look like your toy?
10. You can no longer admire other women in peace because they will call you lesbian.
Continue.
11. When you have to pray for your husband everyday not to die so that his family will not show you pepper.
Please baby don’t die.
12. When the hotel doesn’t want to give you a room because they think you are a prostitute.
On top my own money again?
13. If you propose to a guy, they will say you are desperate.
Is it your proposal?
14. If you wait for a guy to propose, some will say you have too much shakara.
Sigh.
15. You are walking on the road and you see one man stop beside you like,
Excuse me sir, do you have shame?
16. But if you complain about all these things, guys will be saying your wahala is too much.
Y’all are mad.
17. But in the end, you know a girl has got to do what she’s got to do.
This greatness will not need validation.
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