How to survive driving in Lagos

Once you get in your car and enter the streets of Lagos, forget everything you learnt in any driving school you went to, it will be of no use to you. Except you went to this kind of driving school, then you don already enter streets.
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If you didn’t then you’ll need to pay close attention to these tips.

 Drive with only one hand on the steering wheel, the other must be kept free to throw waka at any idiot that tries to overtake you or display their stupidity on your lane.

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As regards traffic lights, Red means stop only if LASTMA is there, Yellow means Go, if you get to see the light turn green then you must be a JJC.

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If police stops you and there is space in front of you, better accelerate.

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There is no need to carry your license or your car’s papers around just keep 2k in your pocket, but if you end up in detention don’t call our name please.

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For the sake of your sanity don’t take anything seriously in Lagos traffic. If someone shouts omo ale at you, shout oloriburku back and keep it moving.

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Keep your hand on your horn at all times, don’t worry everyone will be doing that too.

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In traffic nobody is your friend. If someone tries to overtake you overtake them back. If someone wants to enter your front in your lane say no and do your face like this.

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No new friends

If LASTMA stops you and they haven’t entered your car, then you’ve not been caught yet so better keep trying to move.

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There is no one way in Lagos, except police is there.
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Don’t bother stopping at Zebra crossings, nobody knows why they are there anyway.
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Prepare for a danfo or an okada to remove your side mirror at least once
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