All the struggles you should expect when you date a writer

1. The answer to “what are we?”is never straight.

confused baby

“We are a cloud,

Drifting across the sky,

In limbo,

Passing over Limpopo.”


2. Having to stalk their social media for the next deep quote.

Buhari drop




3. You have to say “I used to write a lot once” to create convos sometimes.

Oprah words

“Deep down, we’re all writers”.


4. You know not to ask “so how far have you gone with the book?”


“You’re disturbing the flow.”


5. They like to talk a lot about how money doesn’t mean much.

History bank

You think it’s me you’re doing?


6. When you text them with ‘tnx’ and ‘kk’.

angry frustrated screaming

Kuku kill me!


7. When you stumble on bae’s story on the internet and find your private conversation in it.


“Baby, I ripped you from the conversation made it look like it was my character that said it.”


8. When you get caught reading something they haven’t approved for another pair of eyes. Run.

Falz soldier

Now, you die.


9. You watch a movie together and half the time, bae is ripping the story apart and finding plot holes


Oga shey you won’t calm down like this?


10. You are damage-control when rejection comes.

crying holding

Let’s just carry all these rejection letters and change to dollars with Aboki.


11. When you are dragging attention from bae with a fictional character.

Caleon cry

Do you love me or do you love Kawaya from the Backlands?


12. When you realise that amazing character is based on their ex, not you.crazeclown cry

So you mean I’m not the most amazing person ever?


13. Did we forget to add drama drama drama?Nene leakes side eye

“Baby, you’re giving me emotional imbalance”


14. Or when bae has Writer’s Block and expects you to be end it.Trusted you

Sorry o.


15. But every time you feel sad, they always have the right words to make you feel better

Hug light


Find yourself a writer today.




When God was sharing chill, I was at the back of the line trying to start a fire.

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