1. You’re finally seeing your in-laws and don’t know whether to dress for a job interview or dress for heaven.
Is this the day I die?
2. The first person you see is her mummy but you already spoke to her on the phone like 12 times.
Mummy please epp my solution.
3. The way your body reacts when her daddy looks at you from head to toe.
Epp me sir.
4. So you start to smile carelessly like a salesman.
I’m here to convince you and not confuse you sir.
5. When you know you can’t lie to him because he is a guy man just like you.
Izz all over.
6. The air conditioning is on but you don’t know why you are sweating.
I think I have Malaria.
7. You try to start a conversation and the first thing that comes out of your mouth is “Tomato is now cost.”
8. And then you dunno whether to continue the conversation or just shut the fuck up.
9. Then daddy asks, “What do you do?” and your inner Frank Donga comes to life.
Actually, I have plenty hustles.
10. And then he says, “But that is not what I saw on your Facebook.”
11. . Your father-in-law says “Bring my cup” but you are sure you heard bring my gun.
I’m the only child of my mother sir. Epp our family sir.
12. When your father-in-law finally cracks a joke with you.
Excuse me sir, you should try stand up comedy.
13. When they finally give you the family albums to look at.
Bae, is that you sitting on a potty in this photo?
14. And then your father-in-law says, “Finally, this girl has brought one sensible man to this house.”
Babe, I thought you said I was the first guy to meet your dad?