6 easy steps to surviving an owambe party

The first thing you need to realise is that this is serious business. And for everything business,

1. Arrive early.

Arrive early


But be rest assured the party will start late. So go with a charged battery plus there’s no shame in carrying a power bank along.

2. It’s all about the food.

When can we start eating

Forget what they said, it’s about the food. Even though you will hear people form with nonsense like “I can buy this food outside if I want.”

Why you always lying

But you didn’t Sir.

3. No ankara no semo.

Save yourself the stigma and try to buy that Ankara, or lace. The people serving food might never stop walking past you with the small chops. But there’s a counter-strategy;

pay attention

4. Tip the food servers: Watch your story change forever with this single move.


”Can I have one more chapman? Or maybe six?”

5. Home training is not very important.

Eat like it’s your last.

Selena Gomez

Order an extra plate. Ask for two drinks and keep one in your bag.  And when you hear, “Its Young John the Wicked Producer,”

Shoki gif

Just because you’ve eaten enough for the next one week.

6. No matter what you choose to eat, make sure you have a taste of their Jollof.

Shaq meme

Period. Party Jollof makes all the pain go away?




The Fu'ad

That go-to guy for different sturvs. Books and the Internet have taken him to Mars. He still loves his Garri with very cold water. Yeah, Content and Copy rock.

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