1. “Wait, am I really getting married?”
2. “Why is she so beautiful? God.”
Muzzbe angel in heaven.
3. Don’t screw this up. Don’t screw this up. Don’t screw this up.
Just this one. Please.
4. Wondering if a girl whose heart you might have broken is somewhere in the crowd.
“If anyone here can show just cause as to why these two may not be joined together, let him speak…” Oluwa cut them downnnnn!
5. Then your man whispers in your ear “She no show.”
6. “Why is my tummy rumbling?”
I thought we were way past this butterfly stage.
7. “If I fart will everyone hear?”
*Waits till music is playing, drops it silently*
8. “You’re a hard guy. Don’t cry. Don’t cry.”
I won’t cry. Amoshine today.
9. Then your groom’s man grabs your shoulder, and says “You did it”.
10. “Nah mehn! Who hard guy done epp?”
Amocry, amocry. Sniff. Amocry, amocry.
11. “We’re going to be having sex any time we like.”
Nobody is dooming us to hell fire for knacks anymore.
12. “Nah mehn, no serious dancing. Just stepping. Man needs the strength for knacks.”
Side step. One-two. Rest. Side-step. Rest.
13. “Can they hurry up please?”
You people should be fast please. We have a plane to catch.
13. “SHE MIIIIINEEEE.”
And I’m heeerrrs.