1. No more free food.
How much is bag of rice now?
2. You start to eat out, and your bank account will just be looking at you like…
You are playing with fire.
3. You have to join community association and their long meetings.
Because there’s no mummy and daddy to attend in your place.
4. You’re a hardworking lady but your landlord thinks you’re an ashawo because your male friends always visit.
Oga landlord, face your life.
5. When you discover that the shirt you left on the chair is still there.
Waawu. Nobody to magically help me drop it in the basket.
6. And then you start to draw scale of preference for what household item to buy first.
Why does this have to be so difficult?
7. So you just vex and buy everything at once.
8. And wake up one morning to realise you’re flat broke.
9. You realise how hard cooking from scratch is.
What am I supposed to do with all this elubo?
10. You start to wonder why you didn’t stay in the kitchen with your mummy and sister.
*cries in online food recipes*
11. Bills. Nepa bill. Waste bill. Bill bill. Life bill.
Kuku bill my soul.
12. Then slowly, you start to adjust to the new life. And it feels good.
Because I cannor come and die.
13. And just when you’re getting comfortable, you start hearing “When will you marry?”
Marry me now.