Danfo buses are the real colours of Lagos. Hate them or need them, they are very important to the city’s survival. Whether its 12am or 4am, there is a high chance you will find a bus going your way.
These are the moments people who enter danfo will relate to too well:
1. When two conductors start dragging you to enter their different buses.
Epp. Don’t let me die like this.
2. When the bus tears your new shirt on your way to job interview.
Who did I offend?
3. When you sleep and wake up after your bus stop.
Izz a hard life.
4. When you are sitting in between two plus size women
Aunty pity me.
5. When you remember on your way home that you forgot to collect 950 Naira change.
Kuku kill me.
6. When the girl in front thinks you are using your knees to press her bum bum.
But which yansh sister?
7. When the driver decides to pass BRT lane to beat traffic.
Washere Fast and Furious.
8. Then LASTMA catches him in front.
Who sent him message sef?
9. When somebody turns your shoulder to mattress.
10. When the woman with two kids beside you wants you to carry one for her and says “E ba mi gbe Aburo yin” (help me lap your younger one.)
Biko if you need epp talk.
11. When the conductor starts pouring spit on you because he’s shouting
Conductor, I paid for transport, not free shower.
12. When the conductor refuses to release your change, which happens to be your last card.
You will die today.
13. When you reach your destination without a flat tire.