Someone just told us about his hilarious, not-so-funny deliverance experience

A series of unconnected events during a severe rough patch in my family led my mum to take our driver’s advice to invite his heavily bearded and dread-haired Cele pastor to our house for a prayer session to cast out the “evil” in our household.

Prophet AY

 

 

Bear in mind that at this time, I was a four year old child who could not even be around Father Christmas or dancing Mickey Mouse mascots without screaming for my daddy (who was not around on this fateful day btw).

Crying boy mummy and daddy

Anyway, the Cele pastor and his crew came to our house all hairy and bearded like Solomon in the Bible and as expected, the moment I saw him come into my comfort zone, I started screaming and crying.

Wailing child

Next thing they do is to ascertain for sure that the demon causing my family’s troubles was not inside me. Why else would I be screaming when I saw the men of God.

Caleon surprise

Like that was not enough, they decided the solution was to beat the demon out of me with palm fronds and brooms doused with anointing oil.

Black woman shock

My mom immediately objected to the idea and sought to protect me from getting unreasonably beat up.

Nene Leakes no

But the next shocking revelation they made was that my own mother was the witch that gave me the “demon egg” that was causing our family’s troubles and so we were to be flogged together until we were both delivered.

Surprised

At this point my mum’s patience had run out and she asked them to leave, but they would not. A heated exchange quickly turned to a chase around the house by a fanatical Cele pastor and his gang to cure mother and child from a demon possession.

A lot of the details are foggy and were retold to me, but I remember my mom snatched me from their midst after both of us got a considerable level of broom flogging and hid in the bathroom while we screamed for the neighbours to save us from a home invasion.

Jordan laughing

Funny as it is now, it was a twisted fucking nightmare at the time.

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